Friday, November 21, 2008

Books for Adults with ADHD

Here are some great books for Adults with ADHD. Ask for them on your Christmas list!

ADD-Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life - A good response to the needs of adults with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. It deals directly and exclusively with the greatest challenge that adults with ADHD face: the problem of disorganization.

Moms with ADD: A Self-Help Manual - Chapters on juggling, dealing with school, work, and holidays. Some really good ideas are presented, but even with all the strategies included, I found this book hard to read. It seems to try a bit to hard.

Out of the Fog: Treatment Options and Coping Strategies for Adult Attention Deficit Disorders - This is an informative first read for adults who have - or suspect they have - ADHD.

Survival Tips for Women with AD/HD: Beyond Piles, Palms, & Post-its - Just the title of this book is an enticement to read. The author touts her book by saying, "Many AD/HD adults have lived for years in shame, depressed that they can't do what for others seem to be such simple things. This book fills the void by offering concrete solutions to daily problems, submitted by AD/HD women for AD/HD women." Amen. A wonderful book with hundreds of ways to help. Like, leave the door open to your microwave when you're not using it so you'll remember to take what is in it out. (Who's been there?!) I also love all the Beatles references in the book...

Chapter samples:
Strawberry Fields: Meals and Entertaining
We Can Work it Out: Relationships and Social Skills
Come Together: Parenting and Family
Taxman: Managing Finances
I’ve Just Seen a Face (But I Can’t for the Life of Me Remember the Name): Memory Tips
Revolution: Technology

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Missing the Basics

Teachers and parents often work so diligently on a skill with a child that the child appears to 'get' it. Sometimes, however, the understanding is only temporary. This could be that the material is so fresh in their minds that they are able to perform well on a test. But the knowledge hasn't 'taken root', and is soon forgotten.

Keep an eye on your child as school progresses. If she is having trouble with mental math, maybe she passed - but never fully understood her basic math facts. If he can't conjugate French verbs, check and see if he really understood the basic grammar taught in grade five. If not, go back to the basics, and review and relearn. Chances are, your child will have caught up developmentally, and this time it will stick.

One of our sons never really learned to write well. I KNOW he was taught well. I know he was able to follow the formula and satisfy the rubric all through elementary school and middle school. When he got to high school, however, the teachers upshifted to more advanced things. And he wasn't grounded enough in the basics to keep up. Add to that a bit of a processing disorder, and you've got problems.

So, we're having to go back to the basics. We're hiring a writing tutor, someone who has the knowledge and the patience to help a child who has good ideas, but can't get them out of his head and onto the paper in an organized and grammatically correct fashion. And hopefully, this time it will stick with him.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Check Your Calendar - Busy Times Ahead

With Christmas coming, it's a good idea to start eyeing your calendar now. Even without the busy-ness of the Holiday Season, there are days in the week that are more busy than others, because of sports or Scouts or church or music lessons or whatever. Wednesdays are always slam full at our house. Keep this in mind when scheduling appointments. Try to sandwich the full days in between two days that are less busy. On these days, try to work ahead a bit in homework. If you have a project coming up, and you're trying to do a little bit each day, leave that 'busy' day out of the schedule. On those frenetic days, make a conscious effort to do some studying while you drive - reviewing spelling words, history facts or multiplication tables. And finally, resist the temptation to do fast food and snacks. Throw fruit or cheese or veggies into a bag and let your kids munch on that. Make peanut butter sandwiches or do a crockpot meal when you get home.


And yes, we have weeks in our lives when every day is too busy...sometimes all we can do is hang on and try not to fall off!

Friday, November 14, 2008

Organizing Homework - For Kids Who Lack The Gift of Organization

Christmas gift idea
Keeping homework organized for school is such a major challenge for kids with ADHD. They lose it, mix it up, remember things that don't exist, ruin it, and are sure they put it "right there"...We've discovered a few top ideas that help even the worst ADHD offenders.

Color Code - At the beginning of the year, each subject gets a color, and the notebook and folder for that subject stay the same throughout. Actually in our house, every year, math is green (for money), science is black (for dead things!), social studies is blue (for the world), and English is red (for frustration?). If you're behind, use your Christmas break and get ahead for 2009. Were we really organized, we would also:

  • Write homework in the planner with the appropriately colored marker

  • Cover books with the subject color

  • After homework is finished, make a bold colored line to mark notebook paper at the top of the page. This helps with organizing all those papers shoved in the bottom of the bookbag, and might help your child find the right paper to turn in.

  • NOTE: I bought some paper on Clearance that had a colored line already printed at the top. (I can't find it anymore - online or off - it wasn't exactly best-selling.) My non-ADHD child, who has the gift of organization, loves it. He says it has trained him to label his pages uniformly. I've tried this to the other boys to no avail, but it might work with your kid!

Staple - Keep a stapler out at all times, and staple all papers together. I've even stapled papers to the planner, so my son would only have to rip them off when it was time to turn them in the next day.

Back Pack Drawer - We put a huge filing cabinet beside our back door. In it goes everything for the next day - the homework in the homework folder, but also clothes, stockings, back packs, lunch, notes, sports equipment, gym clothes, hats and jackets.

Label things. Put your child's name in BIG letters on homework. This also goes for front and back of notebooks and folders, on the side pages of textbooks (do it in pencil even if you have to pay a fine!), and everything else your child takes out of the house. A silver Sharpie is brilliant for labeling dark items like calculators, water bottles, flash drives and cell phones. Buy one of those Sharpies with a clip on it, and permanently attach it to your keychain or purse so it will always be handy. Don't let your kids out of the car without labeling!

Note that there are great Christmas stocking ideas stuffed into this post: Sharpies, staplers, flash drives go along with the old standby's toothbrushes and razors. These are all great little gifts for all those on your list. Check out more Christmas ideas at E300-Scooter.com for Christmas And don't forget to label that Scooter! : )

Thursday, November 13, 2008

IEP and 504 - Up for Review?

If yours is up for review, consider asking the school to add things to the IEP or 504 that will help keep your child more organized. Some ideas:

~Keeping one copy of textbooks at home.
~Exemption from notebook checks.
~Teacher provided copies of homework and notes.
~A time/place after school to organize materials and assignments.
~An individual to assist child with organization on a daily basis.
~Taping organization cues to desk.
~An extra day to 'find' homework that has been completed by is lost. This can be without penalty or with a reduced penalty.
~Planners completed by teacher or planners signed by teachers.
~Homework papers stapled to planner or homework folder by teacher.
~Permission to use the PAC-kit instead of a school provided planner. (Sorry, couldn't resist the tout!)

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

ADHD Books Make Great Christmas Gifts

Don't look now, but Christmas is just around the corner! With that in mind, here are the top ten ADHD books, all perfectly sized to go into that Christmas stocking!

A Mind at a Time - Dr. Mel Levine describes how each child learns differently by defining eight mind systems. He then gives solutions for when things go awry. The book has a lot more information on inattention than most books about ADD/ADHD.

Driven To Distraction: Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder from Childhood Through Adulthood. Written by two doctors with ADHD, this book is primarily about adult ADHD. Still, it provides good insight into the disorder, as well as ways for parents to help their child. And, by the same authors...

Delivered from Distraction - Maximize possibilities. Play on strengths. Surround yourself with those who will support you and recognize your unique gifts. This book is full of advise that will help you as you help your child to get "the Most out of Life with Attention Deficit Disorder"

How To Reach And Teach Children with ADD/ADHD - This book advertises that it will give practical techniques, strategies, and interventions. And it delivers. I have referred to this book many, many times in dealing with my boys, and in working with children with - or without - attention problems. This is a must for every ADHD bookshelf.

Keeping a Head in School: A Student's Book About Learning Abilities and Learning Disorders - Written for students, this easy to read book helps kids understand how to handle their learning differences. Students will come refer to this manual again and again as they get older.

Learning Outside The Lines: Two Ivy League Students With Learning Disabilities And ADHD Give You The Tools For Academic Success and Educational Revolution - I love this book. Full of great stories, great study strategy, and great wisdom. Go to Amazon and read the excerpts they give. (And then you can buy it used for about $4!)

Learning To Slow Down & Pay Attention: A Book for Kids About Adhd - Teaches kids ways to relax, remember things, focus, finish homework and a lot more. A very straightforward and encouraging approach to teaching kids about their ADHD.

Problem Solver Guide for Students with ADHD: Ready-to-Use Interventions for Elementary and Secondary Students - This is one of the few books with a section devoted to ADHD Inattentive. It has a lot of great information, but is a little text-booky in the delivery.

The Myth of Laziness talks about children who "somehow, somewhere lose momentum; in the pursuit of accomplishment they fail to produce; they stall out. And often they face accusations of laziness...They are not lazy; they have output failure." The book introduces seven children as Dr. Levine helps them to understand and cope with their learning differences. One of the chapters takes an in-depth look into dysgraphia. This was the first of Mel Levine's books that I read. Excellent reading.

The Survival Guide for Kids With ADD or ADHD - My favorite quote from this book is, "It's like I have ten TV channels in my head and I don't know which one to watch." Written in a style appealing to elementary kids, this is a great book. It talks about problems at home, at school, with friends, and with emotions. Activities help a child track progress.

For more great Christmas ideas, visit It's the Holiday Season.

Friday, November 7, 2008

Are You Focusing?

While your child often needs one on one monitoring to do homework, it shouldn't always be necessary. While she is working solo, it helps to frequently say something like, "Stop. Are you focusing?" Get her to notice whether she is paying attention to her work and what she is reading/doing. If she is reading, ask if she is thinking about something else. Help her to become aware of when her attention wanders, and teach her to put effort into keeping it from happening!


Visit our websites at Who Put the Ketchup in the Medicine Cabinet and Beat the Recession.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

A Warning and a Hope

Last Monday our fifteen year old asked me at dinner if we could go to Wal-Mart and buy him a Scooby Doo costume for him to wear to "character day" at the high school the next day. (I know. Scooby Doo? But it was homecoming week, and Scooby Doo is his favorite character because in real life, Scooby Doo has Lebanese roots in the form of Kasey Kasem.) "I asked you about it on Saturday." To be fair, he had. But it was a casual mention. I thought it was a fleeting thought.

I thought wrong.

Long time readers know that I am NOT a coddling mother. I believe in consequences, in discipline, in responsibility. And I am very frugal. So I was not running to Wal-Mart to buy this last minute child a $50 Scooby Doo costume.

But I was assailed with a feeling of guilt. I declare I wanted to cry. This child, who grew NINE inches in two years and is now much taller than I am, was really disappointed. He deserved it, but I just felt awful about it. Thankfully, a neighbor was eating dinner with us, and volunteered that she had an Austin Powers costume that he could wear. The two of them supplemented the frilly bloused suit and turned it into Blackbeard the pirate.

Fast forward to yesterday. Our oldest son, who is an Resident Advisor in college, wrote something on his Facebook status that could really, really, seriously have been misconstrued. My heart sank. I let it ride for several hours, but after reading the lively Facebook debate, I put on my mommy hat and called him, advising him to change the comment. Thankfully, he did. (And then one of his brothers begged him to change it back, but that's another story...)

And tonight, yet another son let me know that they still have the air conditioning on in his dorm, and he is freezing at night. I asked him if he needed a blanket, and he said he bought a warm sleeping bag on clearance for $8. But it makes me want to drive to where he is and feed him soup. My baby is cold.

Let's face it. I'm still their mom.

I'm warning you moms - and maybe dads, although my husband shared none of my guilt or worry in the above matters. Your kids may grow up. They may go away. You may not have missing homework or misunderstood Algebra. You may not find the mail in the laundry or the ketchup in the medicine cabinet. But I warn you. You'll spend a good portion of that extra time praying about those missing children, asking Jesus to watch them and guide since they are out of your reach.

And the hope? Read between the lines above. Scooby Doo the Pirate, who has always been a perfectionist was displaying flexibility. The second son...note that he is is in college, is an RA, and that he took my advice! And that cold boy is the cold one in his boxer shorts I was referring to in yesterday's blog post. He is now gainfully employed, is being schooled in a very difficult trade, shops frugally, pays his bills and has a ROTH! He strategically uses a debit card instead of a checkbook, and is obviously remembering to "Problem Solve". I confess, however, that he remains a bit...spacey.

So the hope is this. They will learn - from what you teach them, from their teachers, from life, and from your prayers. Yes, it is a struggle. They may never be organized, and they may always be a bit...spacey. But in the end, these wonderful gifts in your life will become what God has gifted them to be.

Here's our pirate.


Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Problem Solving

NOTE: The following was written November 16, 2006. Watch the blog tomorrow for a follow-up post!

I got an email today from a teacher concerning a project that one of my boys hadn't turned in. I called this child at work!, asking what was up. "I was at the orthodontist when she assigned it and I don't know how to do it." This is why I worry he'll one day lose a checkbook and therefore neglect to pay his bills.

Many times our children have a difficult time 'switching gears' into problem solving mode. One of ours used to sit around in his boxers complaining about being cold. It took a long time before I realized that he really couldn't move his brain to figure out what to do next. One of his teachers taught me to say, "Problem solve!" This little phrase was a verbal push that helps shift the brain into problem solving mode. One day he complained of the cold, I said, "Problem solve!" and he actually said, "Duh! I need to get dressed."

I knew then that I was on the right track. And now, even with today's undone project, I still know that we're on the right track. Because the good news is that this child is getting better. He's actually keeping a checkbook, is always on time to work, and for the most part is doing his schoolwork without my help. He even remembered to vote last week...

This project was just a reminder that ADHD is sometimes a lifelong struggle. The problems change, but the strategies for combating them remain the same. Our job is to transfer the task of gear shifting to the child. But as for now, I can guarantee that this voting aged boy of mine will work on - and finish - the project tonight.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Organizing an ADHD Child

I just created a Squidoo Lens with ten tips on how to keep your ADHD child organized. It could also be titled: "How I Kept My Sanity in the Chaos of Three ADHD Boys". Check it out here: http://www.squidoo.com/organizeADHD.

Make sure you take a look at three of my favorite books on Organizing an ADHD Child.